Article By: Christine Roberts -Kelly MBA /CEO
Contributing Writer

By definition shame is a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused
by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior.
So, ladies let’s talk about money shame! Have you ever experienced
it? You know that little feeling of dread in the tummy or solar plexus;
we get if an uncomfortable situation around money comes up. It can
show up feeling like guilt, embarrassment, or inadequacy related to our
financial situation, past financial decisions, or our lack of financial
knowledge.
The feeling makes you say Ugg.

The fact is money shame can be a barrier to achieving financial well-
being and confidence. Addressing money shame can be pivotal for

having a healthier relationship with money and making
empowered financial choices.
So, this month we will touch on dealing with money shame.
Take a deep breath, close your eyes and reflect on where your feelings of
money shame started. Are they tied to a specific event, life
circumstances, or trauma? My personal money shame stemmed from
childhood; but y’all that could be another whole article! Understanding
the root cause of your shame is the first step toward overcoming it.
Allow yourself to feel the emotions associated with money shame
without judgment. Acknowledging your feelings is essential for
processing and moving through them.
Now we have an idea of how our money shame started we can work
on addressing our mindset around it! Mindset sets the tone of the
conversations we have with ourselves. Replace negative self-talk; I
know easier said than done. Trust me, it takes practice, and you must be
intentional about it. One of my favorite things to say to myself is “talk

nice to me”. The truth is often I need to remind myself to be nice to
ME. If ever I was overheard in the bathroom, you might think I am a
little off (please don’t judge my crazy).

I have had countless conversations with other women (and men) that
start with I am so ashamed… ladies you are not alone! Know that
everyone makes financial mistakes. Focus on the lessons learned from
those mistakes rather than dwelling on them. Then give yourself credit
for the progress and a little grace.
In my collection of mugs, I have one that says “Boss”; for me this means
I am strong enough to do hard things. Focus on empowering yourself.
Arm yourself with financial education and seek out professional help if
needed. If money shame is severely impacting your mental health or
financial decisions, consider working with a financial coach or therapist.
They can provide guidance and help you work through deep-seated
feelings of shame.
Here it comes y’all my favorite part (I will ALWAYS say this) …
develop a financial plan and set realistic financial goals! If we have no
financial road map, how are we going to get to our goals.
Finally celebrate small financial victories. Focus on what you are doing
right with your money, no matter how small. Celebrate each step toward
financial stability and the positive changes you are making. Consider
keeping a journal specifically for your financial journey. Reflect on what
you are grateful for financially, whether it’s a stable job, a supportive
network, my article or progress on paying down debt.

Become aware, take responsibility and then take action to begin the
process to overcome money shame and develop a healthier relationship
with your finances. Remember that financial self-care is an ongoing
process, and shame has no place in our growth.

I would love to hear from you ladies! Drop me an email if you want to
chat: Christine@intentionenterprises.com